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LauraW

Page history last edited by Laura W. 6 years, 2 months ago

Growth of the woods

 

Envision,

Fading frost of your dream

to the depths of a forest,

Light plein air with rays of sun

different shades of light and shadow

you’re free and refreshed.

 

hungry?

the mood is chocolate,

with caramel dressing

like a turtle sundae.

The taste is peanut butter with celery,

to connect yourself to the greenery,

the feeling is serious with a kid’s embellishment.

 

Observe,

The marsh and canopies,

rusted and old

are the evergreens with sticky pines.

My thoughts turn away

 

allergies…

tickling my eye’s inner corner,

and nose

Now the tone is liver.

Look around.

 

Suspicion.

Think trapped,

but in a wonderful way

No one is there

you’re thinking too hard.

The woods are a maze not the labyrinth.

 

Stillness,

is not relevant.

Tune in to the lightest birdsong

you’ll ever hear.

Too soft to identify but by only

one fair and gallant

aria twirl.

 

Convey.

the darkening woodland,

hear the slow river that comes and goes,

controlling your emotions,

the waving motion is

a fantasy.

 

Make friends with the forest.

Grasp the picture

of solicitous natives and find ways to connect.

Keep walking.

Continue to climb and hike and trudge,

along the fading edges of the dream.

 

 

Comments (23)

Jordan E. said

at 8:49 am on May 8, 2014

Your poem was different but good

Rezner B. said

at 8:52 am on May 8, 2014

I can not even begin to describe how good this poem is. You definitely deserved your award. I really like how you left some mystery.

Kaitlyn R said

at 8:52 am on May 8, 2014

Great job! I like how you talked about things that normally wouldn't be associated with the woods and made it work.

Kennedy W. said

at 8:52 am on May 8, 2014

You put it into a different style which made it really cool, good job!

Faith J. said

at 8:52 am on May 8, 2014

This is a very descriptive poem, I really like the punctuation at the ends of the line breaks and I really liked the surreal setting you gave it.

Aliyah D said

at 8:53 am on May 8, 2014

I loved the details in this poem! Good job!

Clay J said

at 8:54 am on May 8, 2014

This was a great poem you describe everything really well.

Callie H. said

at 8:54 am on May 8, 2014

I liked how you compared your feeling at the time to different kinds of food! Great job!

Payton S. said

at 8:56 am on May 8, 2014

This poem was beautiful, I could visualize everything! Good job!

Lily P said

at 8:58 am on May 8, 2014

Nice. It was interesting how you started each stanza with a unique verb, as to help readers do exactly that.

Macy N. said

at 8:58 am on May 8, 2014

You had great descriptions and great details! Amazing job Laura!

mariahc said

at 8:59 am on May 8, 2014

Awesome description. I felt like I was there in the woods listening to the birds.

Chloe K. said

at 9:00 am on May 8, 2014

This was great descriptive poem. I could see everything.

Kenzie W said

at 9:00 am on May 8, 2014

I have never thought of the forest like that! Great job with the details! I liked how you separated them into different lines about each feeling.

Marckus T said

at 9:02 am on May 8, 2014

I really got a good picture and there were very good describing words.

Ashton J said

at 9:06 am on May 8, 2014

I really got a good picture in my head. Great job!

Bailey R. said

at 9:07 am on May 8, 2014

I like the way you started each section with the way you wanted the reader to feel. Good job!

Zoey F. said

at 9:07 am on May 8, 2014

I liked how you started every little paragraph with great adjetives. I could taste the peanut butter on the celery. Good job

Lukas O. said

at 9:11 am on May 8, 2014

You really gave me a good picture

Daniel W said

at 9:14 am on May 8, 2014

Great job you had really good descriptive words and details.

kayla w said

at 9:15 am on May 8, 2014

I like your topic and you had descriptive words. Great work!

Tatum K said

at 11:20 am on May 8, 2014

It had very good emotions and I really like how you describe the first sections.

Mrs. K. said

at 1:58 pm on May 12, 2014

I like your use of words in this poem. It is sometimes difficult to not overdo it with intense and specific words, so you have to find a good balance between the words and the picture you want to convey. I like how sometimes you put words together that would normally not fit well together but make them work in an interesting way, like "one fair and gallant
aria twirl".

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